Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Things from my neighborhood.....

As some of you might know i currently live in Chicago. The Logan Square neighborhood specifically. Well, after being here for about 8 months i have seen several amazing things. Thus, i begin:

A girl got hit by a garbage truck right by my house since she was talking on a cell phone while riding a bike. she died. Who the hell talks on a cell phone while riding a bike. AND how hard is it to miss a garbage truck. its fucking huge! The funniest part is that the shrine that was set up in the median was also ran over a few days later and flattened.....funny.

The other day i also had the pleasure of seeing a truck with, count them......ten exhaust tips. Yes, folks, there were ten. not 4, not 6, but 10. Mind you this was on a rusty mid-80s pickup. if it had been a mid-90s camaro, then maybe.... The best part was that only six were actually hooked to exhaust pipes, the other four were WELDED TO THE BUMPER. I dont care how ghetto your ass is, you have to realize thats retarded.

Im not even going to mention how many virgin mary's ive seen on cars.......

I think the best was the transexican. This was the first month i lived in my apartment. i was coming home and i saw someone walking on the sidewalk in front of my building. picture this average sized person, brown shirt and skirt, pink fishnets, and a full beard.... i literally almost had an accident because i was gaping like a slack jawed yokel. I later mentioned what i saw to one of the other guys in my building and he informed me that i had indeed seen the transexican. i was straight before, but seeing that made me uber-straight. i went home and ate raw beef while hanging sheetrock just to compensate.

this is just some of the shit that happens to me in the city. fuck you.

Porch -

1 comment:

chaosAT said...

... I need photo documented evidence of the Transexican. That's right up there with a Yeti and the Chupacabra.